Tips & Techniques: Out of Town Guests

If you're anything like me, you'll have at least a few out-of-town guests on your list. My family lives all over the US, and my friends are getting spread out too... that means (I may be exaggerating but it feels like) half of our guests will be from a different state! That will unfortunately include my fiance, me and possibly even my parents, if they retire before I get married. Yes, crazy. But there is a way to make sure everything goes smoothly, no one feels awkward, and you don't feel insanely stressed by it all.

Make sure the out-of-town guests know what's going on.
If you were going to an unfamiliar city, you'd want to know what's happening with the event! And it's also useful to know what to do, where to go, and who to call. At a minimum, you should let your guests know the following:

*Dates, times, etc. of all the events they're invited to (shower, rehearsal dinner, etc.) and the expected formality
*Phone numbers of important wedding party and/or family members (and hotel info if they're staying in one)
*Phone numbers of the event venue(s)
*Address of the event venue(s) and directions from several important locations
*Whether you will provide transportation to/from the airport, the venue(s), hotels, etc.
*If you're not providing transportation, information about rental cars, taxis, or other services like public transit

It's also nice to book a chunk of tickets for a flight if you have a number of people coming from the same place and a number of rooms at two nearby hotels: one nicer and one more for the budget-minded. You don't have to pay for them (don't reserve it, but request they be held as a group) but you might be able to get a group discount. That way they'll also have others they know to lessen the stress of travel.

And don't forget to tell yourself what's going on! Make a sheet of when your guests will arrive and leave, where they'll stay (and the number of the hotel, along with the room number if you can get it), and what events they're coming to. If you're arranging any part of their transportation or entertainment, make a note of it as well. It'll save a lot of headaches!

Provide your guests with something to do outside of the wedding.
Don't let your travelers get bored! Although you will be busy for at least the week of your wedding, your guests might not have much to do. It's nice to invite your guests to the rehearsal dinner, but that's not always financially possible. Some families like to host an after-wedding brunch (the following day) or another get-together a different day, but this isn't always easy to do either. So what's a bride and her family to do with the guests needing entertainment? Tell the out-of-towners about the wonderful things to do in your city or town! Most places have plenty of things to do and see -- and will fit nearly any budget (think a trip to an in-town spa or a walk through a nearby park). Better yet, tell them about the things you love to do! Here are a few to get you started:

*Cultural attractions like museums, historical sites, aquariums, and symphony halls
*Sporting places like hiking trails, biking paths, lakes, and parks
*Shopping spots near the venue(s) or hotel(s)
*Interesting urban locations to explore
*Location-specific "places of interest"
*Kid-friendly spots if your guests are bringing children
*Fabulous (and/or reasonably priced!) restaurants near the hotel(s)

Make your travelers feel welcome.
At the least you want to make sure everyone from out of town feels welcomed to your wedding. A "welcome" packet, including the information you want them to know (even if you've put it on a website or sent it out previously) will ease some of the worries they might have about getting to your event. You can even do a bit of decorating -- maybe print the info on a page with your wedding colors or motif, or add a bit of ribbon.

For something a little more involved, you could make up a little "welcome basket" with the same information, plus a few goodies that reflect you, your wedding, or your location. Like favors, they don't have to be expensive and can really make the guest feel good to be there. Of course, you'll probably need to enlist a bit of help -- get your bridesmaids or other helpers to help distribute what you make to the hotel rooms to ease the stress of yet another detail to be worked out.

So what should you include? In addition to the phone numbers and other information, there are a number of things you can put in to treat your guests.

*Homemade goodies, like cookies or candies
*Fresh fruit or packaged snacks (especially good if they've had a long flight)
*A bottle of wine (or a couple bottles of water if they'll be walking around siteseeing!)
*Gift certificates to local services, like the hotel spa or a nearby theater
*Locally made items -- this is especially good if you're having a destination wedding
*One or two "tourist" style maps to help them find interesting extra stops
*A transit map and prepaid transit card (with a note of how many trips or days)
*A personal handwritten "thank you for coming" note

These can all be in a cute basket or another container that fits your theme (bucket for a nautical or beach theme, rhinestone-studded container for a fairytale wedding, etc.). Even a piece of ribbon in one or both of your colors can help tie everything together (literally or figuratively) and help you figure out what you'll do without creating a whole slew of extra decisions.

Make sure that everything you put in your "welcome" is take-home-able. Something too big might not fit in a small suitcase, for example, or overly fragile items could get broken. Like favors, the idea is to be kind, not overly extravagant. Do what works for you -- if that's just a sheet of paper with phone numbers and directions, it's fine! But don't ignore your out-of-town guests; they probably spent money to come see you, so try to show your appreciation however you can, and make them feel as warmly welcomed as possible.